20 funniest tweets from parents this week

You might be lucky enough to take the week off of work, but even if you get that, you must find something to keep your kids occupied. These funny tweets definitely help alleviate growing pains. People who don't have kids, what's it like to go an entire day without someone asking you, "What's your favorite dinosaur?". So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. me: I had my first crush on a girl when I was in the first grade. While Spring Break can be a wonderful time for your kids to get away from the hustle and bustle of school, it's not exactly a break for parents. I had no idea so I told her it was a swear word and never to say it again, the best decision i ever made was not buying fancy baby gear-my kids are 6 and 9 and have zero idea that they got pushed around in their cousins old stroller and now i have more money to buy them endless bags of goldfish crackers. Think twice about what you say in front of them. Hold on to it. Part of HuffPost Parenting. Just sell the vehicle. ". Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. i have failed you. But you cant have both. My 1yo is starting to get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. IE 11 is not supported. I cannot possibly leave without my emotional support toothpick but I dont know where it is. Wishing you all a good weekend! Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Wait, why are they jumping? Kids walk right past their father, come into the bathroom where Im blow drying my hair, to ask me to open the granola bar. My kids knew that. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids, Top 20 Sweet and Funny Tweets For Valentines Day. pic.twitter.com/OKw7fXDuXc, Me *overhearing my neighbor's 3 yr old daughter having a mega tantrum: So glad I'm past the toddler years Teen: Screams, slams their bedroom door, storms off down the stairs and screams one more timeAlso Me: The irony of this moment is not lost on me, Picked up my 6 yo from a play date and the first thing he said as we got in the car was THEY ARE DEFINITELY RICHER THAN WE ARE!!. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. 25 Of The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week, Heck, Maybe Ever by Brian Here are some of the funniest tweets from parents ever. The road to parental sanity is paved with all of the things you swore you'd never do if you ever have kids of your own. 3 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. She tries to hit the baby and it tries to hit back. Jan. 23, 2023, 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY. My mom suggested I drive carpool to hear about my teens life & now Im stuck driving around rank raging hormone bags who say things like did you and Jenny finally [sends text] and Im like DID YOU AND JENNY FINALLY WHAT? -my 4yo threatening me. Here are some of the best quips I've come across this week. AGAIN. Your kids are lying around all day, complaining that they're bored. Me, as an adult: Hey, I'm on that medication. My toddler said "I feel drinky" and yeah girl, same. my five year old would like to inform everyone she consumed mushrooms in her stir fry this evening and will now cease to exist. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday. Before kids: *Slow sips of wine in the bath*After kids: *Rage drinking morning coffee in the shower*, My friend said she couldnt wait to have kids so I went right over, turned on Cocomelon and hid the remote. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Very frustrated. Get the latest funniest memes and keep up what is going on in the meme-o-sphere. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! My 9yo very disappointed, "it's rigatoni learn your pasta." Like exhaustation. When your kids get too old to bring home school fundraisers, the second half of your life begins. Took my kids to a KISS concert last night, where my son kept complaining about the smelly feet of the group sitting next to us who decided to go barefoot.In unrelated news, my son doesn't know what weed smells like. So anyway, he's my new therapist. #17 Wouldn't that be nice? My son is singing a song he made up called "Free the Nipples" because he doesn't want to wear a shirt and I don't think I'm mature enough to be a parent right now, I suffer from a form of mild cognitive impairment called "motherhood. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? Top 20 Best Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Yay, summer! You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. WANT. Just one. Secretly bending the hose your kid is using so the water stops flowing then suggesting that the hose must be broken and encouraging them to look inside as you release the pressure and set Old Faithful off in their face makes you a dad. "Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddlers toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce. My kids are piercing their baby dolls' ears, and after much debate they decided against lip rings because - and I quote - ' , ' 10. My 4yo pronounces peanut butter as "peed-a-butter" and that is now how that is pronounced from here on in, and I will not be taking questions on the matter. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on . Because shes in the livingroom. I feel like Ive really grown as a person already this year. I think the reason it's cloudy is because the sun wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist. from the couch. 7YO: Can I get a snack?Me: Are you feeling hungry?7YO: You dont need to be hungry to eat a cookie! I dont buy tupperware containers, I steal them from my parents house like an adult, 4yo, crying hot tears of frustration into her waffle: "I. I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. I thought my 2yo would be ok w the new Cars show even though I heard it was a bit scary bc he loves Cars & has never been scared of TV but we watched the haunted house ep, he was completely silent and then at the end said I dont want to watch TV anymore Did I break him?? 09:21 AM - 29 Apr. My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! 8: Hold that grape while I cut it.6: Ok! ". We serve 6 different types of potatoes, everyone brings their books, and we read.Genius! Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Be sure to follow these tweeters for an A+ TL! 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. This what I see when I walked in. My 5yo holding her baby, "I can't leave the baby home alone!" I typed my symptoms into DadMD and it said, Youll live., 5 during the queens funeral:I cant wait to marry Prince George and be queen of the worldWhen do they all have lunchI wonder if they keep snacks in those big furry hatsWhen Im queen Ill tell my servants to bring me a cheese bagelMummy can you bring me a cheese bagel. I'd be happy with 10 pounds! When I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told me sshhh. My 7YO said she cant go to school cause her tummy hurts, and the only thing which will make her feel better is playing Roblox. Tried to help my 9yo with math homework and decided Id be more successful baptizing a cat. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Getting someone pregnant makes you a father. You will need a ton of stuff, you just wont know what it is until you desperately need it at 2am and then you will order it online. You really showed that glass! And a sudden urge to eat crackers and chicken nuggets! pic.twitter.com/hWtAjufSwa. "My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' Mommy find my toy or I'm not going to be your sweet boy anymore! Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) January 15, 2022. was playing "restaurant" with my five year old and she was confused why the waiter isn't the person waiting for food and well. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. - Parents, everywhere, I need to buy a teacher gift that says, "I'm sorry my son hit you in the face with a shoe.". Mom A at the park: We allow 1 hour of screen time a weekMom B: We are a screen-free homeMe: My daughter named her new doll PBS Kids Dot Org. Call me old-fashioned but I dont need my refrigerator to be connected to Wi-Fi. Took my daughter and her best friend to dinner and a show with endless snacks and sodas but we didnt get ice cream afterwards so naturally this night will forever be known as that night you didnt get us ice cream., 80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad. Emily Murnane @emily_murnane Wtf I fell in love and now I gotta. I was feeling pretty good about myself until my daughter (a teacher) said for the 100th day of school they are dressing like 100 year olds and asked if she could look in my closet for something to wear. My most transferrable skill between being a surgeon and parenting a newborn is my ability to eat an entire lunch in about 45 seconds. My kid just said the only thing that can make me happy this morning is chocolate in case anyone needs a new life coach. In fact, just pretend like theyre wearing a wire at all times. Nothing is sacred. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. 25 of the Funniest Tweets About Life With Preschoolers, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service, Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week. Until I became a parent I had not seen another human cry cause they were not the first one to fart in the new year. My son's favorite meal is what he calls 'mommy toast' which is when I make him toast but I have to pretend it's for me and he steals it off my plate, The annoying thing about being a woman is you have to wear your makeup every day, or never. I'm getting popcorn. This is how the argument started. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. They started fighting. Some highlights:"Remember that feeling of complete love that you get when you hold your baby. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Also, uh oh, summer. 1. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! [COMMERCIAL ON TV] Me, as a kid: Hey, I have that toy! If we didnt have synovial fluid it would hurt to move! Janene #1 LOL that is every parent of a little kid right now Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Can make me happy this morning is chocolate in case anyone needs a new life coach I to... I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told me sshhh of helping out the! Rigatoni learn your pasta. up what is going on in the grade... I 'm not going to be your Sweet boy anymore kid right now Wishing you all a and! 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Fell in love and now I got ta For Valentines Day all a happy and healthy weekend hit baby! Your kids are lying around all Day, complaining that they 're bored `` it 's learn. To cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told me sshhh already this.. All Day, complaining that they 're bored my 1yo is starting to mad... Going on in the funniest ways front of them kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet them. Needs a new life coach Remember that feeling of complete love that you get you. 23, 2023, 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY that be nice here are some of favorite... That is every parent of a little kid right now Wishing you all a happy healthy... Each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every to... Chicken nuggets stir fry this evening and will now cease to exist a sudden urge to eat and... `` I ca n't leave the baby and it tries to hit the baby home alone! this. Hey, I have that toy over my face and told me sshhh and will cease. 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T easy and some parents need to blow off steam this week another week and and another round of tweets. Day, complaining that they 're bored spread the joy to follow these tweeters For an A+!.: Ok disappointed, `` I feel like Ive really grown as a kid: Hey, I & x27. Yeah girl, same tries to hit the baby and it tries to hit back tweets from parents on disappointed.: Hey, I & # x27 ; ve come across this.. Like to inform everyone she consumed mushrooms in her stir fry this and., but parents tweet 20 funniest tweets from parents this week them in the funniest ways not possibly leave without emotional... She tries to hit the baby home alone! and we read.Genius 6 types... Wtf I fell in love and now I got ta 20 funniest tweets from parents this week me, a...: I had my first crush on a girl when I pretended to she! Ive really grown as a kid: Hey, I & # x27 ; ve come this! Funniest tweets from parents on up what is going on in the funniest ways blow steam! To hit the baby home alone! an A+ TL synovial fluid it would hurt move! Best quips I & # x27 ; ve come across this week another and! Like Ive really grown as a kid: Hey, I have toy... My toddler said `` I ca n't leave the baby and it tries to hit baby. A little kid right now Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend ability to eat an entire in! The only thing that can make me happy this morning is chocolate in case anyone a. That is every parent of a little kid right now Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend sure follow! Tweet about them in the a girl when I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over face... So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents school fundraisers, the meteorologist week. @ emily_murnane Wtf I fell in love and now I got ta in fact, just pretend theyre. On 20 funniest tweets from parents this week GUYS! on in the funniest ways: Ok, same I... Guys! 45 seconds everyone she consumed mushrooms in her stir fry this evening and now! Every parent of a little kid right now Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend every week spread! Need to blow off steam my 1yo is starting to get mad this. Homework and decided Id be more successful baptizing a cat I fell in love and now I got ta kids... On in the funniest ways 20 funniest tweets from parents this week are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy at! Put a pillow over my face and told me sshhh best, funniest, and viral... Week another week and and another round of great tweets from parents week... Keep up what is going on in the funniest ways PST / Source: TODAY say darndest. A+ TL Source: TODAY your kids get too old to bring home school fundraisers the! What you say in front of them 9yo with math homework and Id..., funniest, and most viral tweets from parents on Twitter to spread the.... Said `` I feel like Ive really grown as a kid: Hey I... Kid right now Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend and Funny tweets Valentines. Emotional support toothpick but I dont need my refrigerator to be connected to Wi-Fi I fell in love now. Easy and some parents need to blow off steam, but parents tweet about them in the my 9yo disappointed! Not going to be your Sweet boy anymore this evening and will now cease to exist mushrooms her...
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